Beware: Major Love Buzz Post

Gah, this is going to sound really insincere (and did I just begin a post with the word “gah”?)…

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…but I am being very sincere here. I have on my Abe Lincoln face right now. Actually, completely scratch that image from your mind, it’s a little disturbing.

I want to tell you guys a little tale. I did not have a good day today. I’m not going to expand on that, just take my word for it. I decided to do my previous post because I thought it would cheer me up a little. Before I began writing that post, I actually had drafted a pretty depressing post about how crap my day was. Then I realised that I was just complaining and that it wasn’t going to really contribute anything to anyone’s day, including mine. I let it in my drafts and thought about publishing it.

Just before I published my award post, Jack called me. He’s away on very important PhD business. As he was talking to me, I realised I was on the verge of tears; inexplicable but very real tears.

So when I came off the phone I had a little “get your shit together, Jane” pep-talk with myself and did up the last post. It did cheer me up.

But you know what really cheered me up? You guys. You guys had no idea how I was feeling and yet you managed to be the most positive influence on my day. You might think that your kind comments don’t mean that much to me, but the truth is, you have no idea how happy they make me. This is not me looking for kind comments, but rather thanking you. Thank you friends; for your encouragement, your faithfulness, your good humour, your intellect, your experiences…everything! Thank you for taking the time to read my posts and for leaving comments. Thank you for being kind to me. I really wish I could do more to repay you guys but you’ll just have to accept some invisible internet chocolate (and even though you’ve never met me, it’s totally legit. Promise.) I don’t think I have ever felt part of a nicer online community and it feels great. You guys are nicer than my Facebook friends. Just don’t tell them that. .

I know this all sounds so soppy, but you guys just make my day! Now let’s all get into a circle and sing Kumbaya.

Poem: A Christmas Childhood

This is a beautiful poem that I learned when I was in school that will punch you square in the feelings. It’s by poet Patrick Kavanagh and it’s called ‘A Christmas Childhood’.

My father played the melodion

Outside at our gate;

There were stars in the morning east;

And they danced to his music.

Across the wild bogs his melodion called

To Lennons and Callans.

As I pulled on my trousers in a hurry

I knew some strange thing had happened.

Outside in the cow-house my mother

Made the music of milking;

The light of her stable-lamp was a star

And the frost of Bethlehem made it twinkle.

A water-hen screeched in the bog,

Mass-going feet

Crunched the wafer-ice on the pot-holes,

Somebody wistfully twisted the bellows wheel.

My child poet picked out the letters

On the grey stone,

In silver the wonder of a Christmas townland,

The winking glitter of a frosty dawn.

Cassiopeia was over

Cassidy’s hanging hill,

I looked and three whin bushes rode across

The horizon – the Three Wise Kings.

An old man passing said:

“Can’t he make it talk” –

The melodion, I hid in the doorway

And tightened the belt of my box-pleated coat.

I nicked six nicks on the door-post

With my penknife’s big blade –

There was a little one for cutting tobacco.

And I was six Christmases of age.

My father played the melodion,

My mother milked the cows,

And I had a prayer like a white rose pinned

On the Virgin Mary’s blouse.