Hi guys! Sorry I’ve been absent lately. Would you believe me if I said I’ve been away doing top-secret spy stuff? No? Good, that’s what I want. Okay. You got me. I’ve really been hanging upside down off my sofa wondering: A) How long would it take for all the blood to rush to my head for me to pass out and B) How the hell do bats do this all the time?! So yes, I’ve been productive. I also got totally hooked on the podcast Serial which kinda stole my life for a week. If you’ve listened to it please come talk to me in the comments because I have no one to speculate with!
You may remember I was going to a hen party, or bachelorette party to those of you across the water. It was so much fun to catch up with everyone and I had a relatively alcohol-free weekend. I know guys. This is not a drill. I DIDN’T GET WASTED. Does this mean I’m now a grownup?! Wow, that’s scary.
Anyway, I actually stopped by to share probably the best headline you will read today. I was scrolling through an Irish media app that I have when I came across this:
Like, WHAT?! I don’t even know where to start with this. I haven’t been to many funerals, but I think if all funerals sounded this exciting, I would go to all of them. Literally, every single one.
I also wanted to share some pictures of my cat. We got her a scratching post for, you know, scratching. The thing is, she doesn’t actually use it for scratching. She seems to think it’s some kind of stripper pole because she has been hanging off that thing like her name is Kandy Glitterbox and I’ve been resisting the temptation to throw money at her. Or kibble. She’d probably prefer that.
I am the worst mom ever…
Sorry that this post is all over the place but you guys know the deal with me by now. I will eventually get around to throwing together a somewhat coherent post soon, but until then why don’t you tell me what you’ve been up to while I enroll my cat in a convent school?
The cat does look like she’s about to do a pole dance. Maybe you could train her and make some money with it. 🙂
Haha, it would be quite the spectacle with a very strange clientele!
It that a wound up rope on the pole? If it is, you can start taking book on how long before it unravels. That’s when the fun begins, they start chasing the dangling bits and dragging the whole post around the house. 🙂
It sure is. I didn’t even think of that haha! She had a catnip-laced mouse that she’s obsessed with so she doesn’t pay too much heed to this post at the moment.
Something to look forward to. A lot of fun to watch. 🙂
Oh I love “all over the place”janey. That’s some cat show you’ve got there. All she needs is a pink boa…Mom. 😁
Haha, she would look adorable with a pink boa! I was going to say it might be going a little too far, even for me…but nope 😀
Send Kandy Glitterbox my way. My neighbor, Baby Girl, is a Certified Life Coach and always has lots of great advice.
She needs a strong female role model in her life because clearly, I’m just not responsible enough.
Oh my goodness, your cat is hilarious.
She’s a character alright!
Funeral strippers? Pall barers? Pall dancers, maybe? Do they draw straws to see who has to give the dead guy a lap dance? Oh, Janey, this is just too terrible a subject. If you drink too much before you go, do you say you got em-bombed? Oh, no, please, make me stop.
Hahaha! It’s just so bad, it’s good. I mean, how did this become a thing?! Were a bunch of guys just sitting around and someone said “man, I’m bummed…you know what would make me feel better? Strippers.” And then this crazy idea was born. “Em-bombed” BAHAHAHAHA
Yes, the first one, you know it was a frat guy who kicked and his brothers who came up with the idea, Janey. “Hey, don’t you think Joe would have wanted us to have that stripper we had at Spring Fling ’99 come here to his wake?”
Don’t you think? I’m halfway to a movie scene already.
I so know what I am having at my funeral….
I’m having a combination of strippers and clowns just to really mess with everyone’s heads.
I love your random posts! But…wait a minute! You didn’t get drunk on this hen do? I think, my friend, you have hit *DUN DUN DUN* …ADULTHOOD! Saying this, I consider myself an adult, and I got wasted to the point of barely being able to stand-up at a bbq last week… there’s hope for you yet! 😀
Have an amazing weekend! (I know it’s only Friday, but it’s the start!)
I’m off to a funeral 😉
Ha, I know Amanda, I’m scared too. I just dreaded the hangover so instead, I decided that drinking water would be a good idea. I still danced like a loon and had a lot of fun.
I will now have to live vicariously through you! I have no doubt that a crazy drunken night isn’t too far off for me though.
Now I want to know about this bbq because I am sure drunk Amanda is even more hilarious than sober Amanda 😀
Have a great weekend too! Funeral or otherwise haha!
Lol I love your cat 🙂
So you wanted to know about my day? Fine, but you asked!!
As I am writing this comment I’m in school. Sitting in a stuffy, airless, little classroom doing nothing.
Why you ask?
Shouldn’t I be doing something productive?
Well au contraire my dear!
Nope. The German teacher decided not to show up, so we got a spontaneous sub teacher sitting at the front typing on a computer while I sit somewhat in the back typing away this. Also we can’t get our other books so we be doing nothing.
*ahem* so. To conclude this very long essay: I. Am. Bored.
Somebody save me!!!!!
Oh lordy this is like a mini post… O.O
Ha, sounds like you had enough time!
Haha, this made me laugh! I know what it’s like to be the substitute teacher, it’s hard! I also know what it’s like to be the bored student down the back of class :p we used to pass stupid notes or play games. Or draw silly things. Oh, good times indeed! Hope you weren’t too bored!
Was reminded of your site by Amanda. Your posts are hilarious!
Aw thanks, that’s lovely! I haven’t been posting much lately so I must get my butt in gear. Thanks for stopping by and I hope you had/are having a great weekend! 🙂
Kandy Glitterbox !!! LOLOL
Ha, she could become a meme yet!