Being in a Long-Term Relationship 

I have been in a relationship for twelve years. Yes, someone has put up with me for twelve long years. Although there have been times that my boyfriend and I have wanted to kick each other in the shins, we generally are a content and functioning couple. Just don’t put one slice of pizza in front of us, because it won’t end well.


During these past twelve years, I’ve learned a lot of things: don’t ever shave your eyebrows, the capital of Australia is Canberra and-

Oh right, I was talking about my relationship.

Yeah, I learned some stuff about relationships too. Here it is:

1. Small Things Become Big Things

If you’d have told me at the start of our relationship that we would one day be arguing about who’s turn it is to make the tea, I’d have probably scoffed and arrogantly reassured myself that we would never become that couple. The thing is, when you both get used to each other, and I mean, really used to each other, you do start to argue about seemingly trivial matters. Some of our most ridiculous arguments have included:

  • Teabags: is it ever okay to put them in the sink?
  • The dog knows when you’re lying to her!
  • Those are my socks!
  • Pick up the damn towel!

I’ve, er, never done this…


The important thing is to remember that these are inconsequential matters and you really do love each other and all that other crap.

2. You Stop Trying To Impress Each Other

The start of a relationship is a lot of fun; you can’t keep your hands off each other and you’re yet to find out about his weird Barry Manilow obsession *shudder*. It’s also a time fraught with nerves and attempts to impress each other. After twelve years, I’m completely comfortable around Jack. I don’t feel the need to wear lots of makeup or even brush my hair. Okay, so I brush my hair…sometimes…on Sundays. 


3. You Exist in Your Own Little World

Sometimes Jack and I will be around a family member or a friend, and this will happen:

Jack: Will you get the…?

Me: Yeah, but should I make the…?

Jack: That’d be nice. I’ll get a…

Me: Perfect, thanks.


Only we know. And possibly dolphins. 


4. The Small Gestures Become Better Than The Big Ones

Jack doesn’t often buy me flowers. Instead, he makes me a cup of tea (despite our arguments) without me asking on a cold day, he has dinner on the table when I come home from work, and he wraps me in blanket when I’m cold. Sometimes he buys me flowers but I honestly prefer the little gestures; they’re much more thoughtful and considerate. Although I wouldn’t say no to a Mercedes.


5. Their Annoying Habits Become Unbearable 

I love Jack. I do. Really. But when he mumbles monosyllables at me when I ask him a question I WANT TO THROW CACTII AT HIM. *calms down* I’m good, I’m okay. 

Likewise, I annoy him. But everyone sounds loud when chewing steak, right? RIGHT? 


6. You Get into a Comfortable Routine

I always sleep on the right side of the bed. I sit on the right side of the coach. I have my mug, he has his mug:

It’s very amoosing…

He knows that I like my tea milky and I know that he likes his strong (enough with the tea, geeze). Some people might think we’re like a boring old couple, and those people would be right. We are. Prune juice shots for everyone.

7. You Learn to Compromise 

Lol, not really guys. You always give in.


Psst! Cupid or Cats is a finalist in the Most Humous category in the 2015 Bloggies. I don’t know how that happened either. If you would like to vote for me, you can click on the link below. It’s very simple and I would really appreciate it. If you’ve already voted, thank you so much. There’s a messenger pigeon on its way to you with your reward. Probably.

2015 Weblog Awards

35 thoughts on “Being in a Long-Term Relationship 

  1. The V-Pub says:

    Yes, long lasting relationships are crafted by experts in compromise. What? Did I just say that? I apologize, but I’ve been confused since I read the words Manilow.

      • Ritu says:

        Totally! We annoy the check out ta each other but then he does something small, silly but sweet and it melts my heart, like it used to all those years ago, in the beginning!
        Like tonight, I’m back from a long day at a course and suffering a migraine (I know, I shouldn’t be on here then!) And he put the kids through their bed time routine and made me tea (admittedly without the sugar I needed!) And toast (soggy) but it’s the thought, isn’t it?!

      • janeybgood says:

        Aw that’s so sweet! All those little gestures really do make the difference. I think that’s really the secret to a successful relationship. Hopefully your migraine clears up!

      • Ritu says:

        Still bubbling in the background… I should really put my phone down and sleep lol!!! But this blogging business is addictive!!!

      • Ritu says:

        *stands up* pMy name us Ritu and I’m a WordPress addict!
        See… Migraine, and I STILL came back! I’m meant to be asleep now!!!!!

  2. Julie the Workaholic says:

    Ha! This is not only awesome, but so very true. The hubs and I have been married 11 years, together for 13, and neither of us (miraculously) is dead by the other’s hand. Yet. 😉

    Yeah, we annoy the crap out of each other; like how he blew of Valentine’s Day when we’d made a conscientious decision to observe it at the risk of our own health and well being. But I come home cranky and b!tch about everything that pissed me off that day, so I call it a draw. 😉

    I wouldn’t trade him for the world. ❤

  3. amandalyle1986 says:

    Haha! I love this soooo much and I can relate in soooo many ways. The tea bags in the sink, ARGHHHHH. The towels on the floor… more ARGGGGGHHH. The cleaning the toilet with my husband’s toothbrush…. OOPS!

    Congrats on reaching the 12 year mark, you deserve all the tea in China (made by your boyfriend!) My husband and I have only just reached the 9 year mark… and I have considered divorce many times. haha! I guess, like you say, we got to love them for who they are…which 9 out of 10 times, is a PAIN IN THE ARSE!

    Great post 🙂

    • janeybgood says:

      What drives me insane is how he just swans around the house, leaving his crap all over the place for me to pick up. Look at us ranting haha!
      The funniest thing is, if anyone else was to say anything about him, I’d be like a lioness protecting her cub ha!
      I’m wondering will things change when we’re married? Nine years is amazing 🙂 you’re an inspiration! I’m hoping we get as far into a marriage without killing each other.

  4. SuperFreakMe says:

    You guys are sooo blessed/lucky whichever one you like, but you truly are. We’re in 17 years and barely holding on by a string. :”(
    Married, maybe that is the problem. That paperwork. I just don’t know what happened. Really wanted to period each one of those words in that last sentence, due to my passion for this subject. 17 years ago I met my Knight in Shining Armor. Blissful, incredible years passed, until 5 years ago. It’s as if someone switched off a light, unplugged the breaker box, or worse, blotted out the Sun. There’s been no stepping out, no drugs or alcohol to speak of and no physical abuse on either of our parts.
    I. Just. Don’t. Know. What. Happened. I wish I knew. Marriage counseling, here we come.
    Your post really made me smile, JANEYBGOOD! It makes my heart happy to see it can happen.

    • janeybgood says:

      I truly appreciate such an honest and heartfelt comment. Do you want to hear something honest in turn? The night I wrote this, my boyfriend and I had an argument and I wanted to delete this post because I was so mad. There are times where I want to come on here and vent about him but underneath all the frustration, I do love him.
      I can’t offer you any advice on marriage, I’m afraid. I have often wondered does something change when a couple gets married. Do you think it’s complacency, perhaps? I know that we have to have a conversation a few times a year about our relationship or else we run into all kinds of problems.
      You say it’s been five years since you’ve felt this way. I’m not expecting you to share too much with me here, but I’m just wondering if you can pinpoint some kind of source of the problem?
      I suppose you can take some positives from the fact that you recognise there’s a problem. My parents pretended everything was rosy for thirty years and then couldn’t take it anymore. They haven’t seen each other or spoken to one another in years.
      The most important thing that we do is talk. When I say “we”, I mean “I” because it’s usually me doing the talking haha.
      I truly wish you luck in your marriage and I really appreciate you taking the time to share this with me.

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