Say you want to boost your blog stats, inject your site with a bit of razzle-dazzle, wow every visitor with your gorgeous graphics and perfectly crafted posts… Well, there’s an abundance of blogging advice and tips out there for you to reach for those blogging stars. So hit up Google and say hi to all the cat memes you’ll inevitably meet for me.
But say you want your blog to be rubbish? Not just rubbish, the biggest pile of reconstituted horse faecal matter this side of the Seine. Well friends, as the author of a blog that is so spectacularly disorganised that it makes a person on an episode of Hoarders look like Sheldon Cooper, I feel it would be prudent to dispense the bad blogging tips. Because it’s boring being perfect all the time.
So here it is guys, my top tips to achieve blogging mediocrity:
1. Have no schedule, whatsoever
Sure, you could have a blogging routine and schedule posts for say, once or twice a week…or you could just post whenever you damn well please. *picture me slugging beer and smoking cigars…and coughing because cigars are awful.*
Seriously, why make blogging a chore? Just write whenever the mood (or owl meme) strikes. It’s what I do and we all know I’ve made a huge success of my life. *awkward silence*
2. Get lazy and just post pictures of hungover owls
People like owls.
3. Don’t bother editing your posts
Peple wil stll kno wht u meen.
4. Forget what you were talking about halfway through a post so just post a picture of a cat…
5. Post while highly intoxicated*
LET’S GO STREEEEEEAKING!!
6. Have absolutely no blog niche
Honestly, I still have no idea what category my blog fits into. I haven’t made a concerted effort to attain a defined niche. Instead, I post whatever my brain decides is a good idea. You may have noticed my brain likes owls, cats, weirdness, awkwardness, memes and my boyfriend.
Do you have any bad blogging tips?
*I’m not intoxicated right now. It’s a school night and my cat needs a responsible role model.