Five Ways To Find Your Inner Child

Do you ever just not want to be an adult? Do you ever just want to let your inner child run riot in an explosion of macaroni, crayons and bad decisions?

I have to say that I adult pretty hard on a daily basis. I work hard, I’m allowed to play with scissors and I even pay taxes. Except on the wages in my off shore account, but that’s for another post.* There are times, however, when I yearn for the simplicity of my childhood years; for the times when my only worry was how my friend was definitely shafting me in our Pokemon card exchanges. If you too miss the carefree fun of your childhood, here are some ways to let your inner child out for an irresponsible time:

1. Make prank phone calls

There is nothing quite as exhilarating as asking some stranger over the phone whether their refrigerator is running. Some would say “that’s immature” and to those people, I say “is your refrigerator running?”😀

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2. Colour

Let’s face it, no one ever grows out of colouring. It’s the third most fun thing you can do with your hands (the first being eating pizza, the second being a tie between juggling and mime artistry).

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3. Give the worst comeback in an argument…EVER

The best thing about being a child? Being exempt from mature debate because, well, you’re a kid. When someone is clearly gaining the upper hand in an argument, you don’t have to actually respond with anything remotely sensical. Say something like: “why don’t you go high-five a unicorn?” Argument: won.

4. Eat so much junk food you almost throw up

Remember when you got to go to a friend’s house for a birthday party and Mammy wasn’t there to say “stop stuffing your face with ice cream sandwiches and bacon” so you just went wild on an orgy of sugar and bite sized snacks? You officially did not have a childhood if you didn’t throw up from overeating at least once. Perhaps on a slide. While wearing your favourite Kylie Minogue top. I’ll stop now. So what are you waiting for? Break out the raw cookie dough and marshmallows.

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5. Play a game

I actually play games with my friends all the time (physical games, not mind games, puhlease). Once a friend of mine called to my house unexpectedly. When I answered the door, I was breathless. My friend asked what Jack and I had been up to, winking at me in the process. My answer? “We’ve just had a killer game of Hide and Seek.” I’m not allowed play board games though, ’cause I’m a little bit of a sore loser. They may have been an incident with a monopoly piece and Jack’s nose. Ahem.

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*The author would like to clarify that this was a poor attempt at humour and wishes to reassure any members of the revenue commission who may have been lured to this blog by promises of free owl pictures that the author pays her taxes and does not actually have an offshore account. She doesn’t even know where the Cayman Islands are.

27 thoughts on “Five Ways To Find Your Inner Child

  1. weight2lose2013 says:

    Three words for you. Ding Dong Ditch. That’s what my kids play. They run up to a door and press the door bell and run like hell. I’ve taken this to be my weekend passion and so should you.

  2. dweezer19 says:

    Okay Janey, except for freaking me out that now I KNOW how much older I am than you (my youngest son collected Pokemon cards) I really loved this. Sister (or very young friend, as it were) I own an authentic set of Jacks, and have Scrabble and Yhatzee on my iPad. I still get cravings for delicately burned frozen pizza and homemade frozen daquiris every time I play. We had sone jumping slumber parties playing that one. We did the phone thing too. “Hello, is your refrigerator running?” Yeah…Im THAT old. Lol. I color all the time with my nifty sets of prismacolor pencils. And okay, who doesn’t still love a bubble bath and make water bubbles with the washcloth? Now and again I take out the Barbies…just to make sure they are okay to pass on to my granddughters. 😀 i wonder if the neighborhood rules will let me put up a tetherball set…..

    • janeybgood says:

      To be fair, I was way too old to be collecting Pokemon cards but still…
      I’ve heard a lot about this Yhatzee (mainly from TV shows) but I’ve never played it. Pizza and daquiris sound like heaven.
      I find coloring very relaxing! Whenever I get a class to make posters or anything, I join in. I think I like it more than they do😀
      I make bubble beards in the bath and pretend to be old and wise! I wish I had Barbies😦 my niece is just not interested.
      Screw the rules, you put up that tetherball set😀

  3. girlseule says:

    Haha prank calls are the best. I remember when I was traveling me and some people I met took turns pranking each other’s parents…… we were all in our mid-late 20s at the time.

    • janeybgood says:

      Haha, I love this🙂 I rang my friend’s mother pretending to be a telemarketer that just wouldn’t give up. It was going great until she asked to speak to my manager haha.

  4. cheergerm says:

    Some fine strategies there Ms Cupid. Whenever I feel like curling up in a corner with my thumb in my mouth and murmuring ‘Mama’, I suggest to my lads that I will ‘deign’ to watch a Disney kids movie with them. I sigh heavily ‘OK, I will watch ‘Free Birds/Frozen/Cloud with a Chance of Meatballs’ with you.’ This is totally awesome as I can sit there on my butt and avoid any grown up stuff. As good a reason as any to have kids. 😁

    • janeybgood says:

      I adore Disney Pixar films. I make my other half watch Up constantly. And I love all the old classics: The Lion King, Beauty and the Beast, Mulan, etc…

      Now I just feel like a Disney marathon😀

  5. bensbitterblog says:

    I don’t need any help being an inner child, but thanks for giving me more ways to be one. I especially like the calling of Domino’s to get Pizza Hut’s number…mostly cause I don’t know it.

  6. Michelle R. Eastman says:

    Holy Fat Rolls! Super-fat babies and (wait, I have to look up how to spell it) shar pei puppies are among my all-time favorite things! Thanks for the dose of cuteness! And I’ll be trying your #3 tip the next time I fight with my husband.

    Michelle

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