Do you ever wonder what it would be like to meet another blogger in “real” life?
I know I give off quite the weird vibe on here, but if you were to meet me in real life….actually, I’d give off a weird vibe there too.
Here’s what you would probably think about me:
1. Her accent is funny
My accent ranges from a mild Irish lilt to a full on crazy incomprehensible Cork accent when I’m angry. Think Tom Cruise in Far and Away. Yeah, it’s nothing like that.
2. She’s actually kinda shy at first
Don’t worry, I wouldn’t just run into the room yelling
because that would be creepy. I’m more of a “release the creepy slowly” kinda gal.
3. But wait, she is hugging me. And asking me to do karaoke and dance fight with her.
Don’t worry, that just means I’m highly intoxicated. In which case, WATCH OUT.
4. She plays with her hair a lot
This is my worst habit. I just can’t stop. It really takes away the poignancy of “Dulce et Decorum Est” when I’m reading it and twirling my hair.
5. For an English teacher, she uses a lot of incorrect grammar in conversation
What I would write:
I met Mary at the weekend. She asked my how my mother is so I responded that my mother is doing well. In fact, I told her, she’s great.
What I would say:
I ran into Mary at the weekend. She says “how’s yer mudder?” so I goes “she’s grand like. She’s feckin’ great even.”
Don’t hate me.
6. She laughs at her own jokes
I can’t help it if I’m hilarious.
7. Why is she wearing owl jewellery?
Because owls are f**king amazing. Duh.
8. We were talking about the Ukrainian Crisis and she just blurted out that her cat can do handstands
Er, sometimes my mind…goes other places. Weird places.
9. Her Al Pacino impression is off the hook, yo!
I don’t know how I figured out I can do this but the important thing is, I can.
10. She says “aaam” constantly. STOP SAYING AM!
I guess this is the Irish various of “um”, but because of my accent, I drag it out and it sounds awful. I say it in every sentence.
When I was training to be a teacher I had to video record one of my classes and show it to my class in college. Hearing myself say “am” 995 times* in a thirty minute period was excruciating. As was tripping over a student’s bag and trying to pretend it didn’t happen.
*sometimes I like to put random asterisks in my posts for no reason. I’m totally joking, I put it there because 995 times is a slight exaggeration. It was more like 980, tops.
Now that you have practically met me, tell me what I would notice about you?
P.S. I also have an annoying slight lisp and a tattoo but no one cares about that.