Er, hi. Is this awkward?
Er, yes…it is. Will I break dance?
Erm, no thanks.
What do you think of my blog?
What’s a blog? Haha. See, I can be funny too. It’s pretty great, keep going.
Do you mind that I write (mostly nice) things about you?
I especially like the post where you said I am incredibly handsome, virile, witty, intelligent, athletic, Adonis-like…
Jack, I never wrote that.
Yeah, I know. Hint hint.
What did you really do with the remote?
(A few years ago, our remote “mysteriously” vanished. Jack denies having anything to do with it but he lies as good as he break-dances, which is not good at all. Anyway, because we’re lazy we still haven’t replaced it.)
Look baby, the remote is gone. And like the corpse of Jimmy Hoffa, no one knows where. Just let it go.
Tell my lovely loyal followers a little about yourself.
Um, I like pie. I’m not good at this. I’m definitely not afraid of the dark. Not even slightly. Not one. Little. Bit.
You’re doing a PhD. How’s that going?
It’s going really well actually. Just yesterday, I discovered that America’s relative power positi….oh, you were just being polite when you asked? Awkward.
No, no… I really care and stuff.
Important question: Which Backstreet Boy is your favourite?
The one that wore the bandanas. They made him automatically cool.
His name is AJ Jack, stop pretending you don’t know.
What goes through your mind when I wear my onesie?
All kinds of conflicting emotions.
What’s the best thing you’ve ever done?
You. Hahaha, seriously, I kill me.
If my mother is reading this, then receiving an education.
It’s not the oscars, Jack, I’m sure she’ll never see this. Does that sound snarky? Sorry. Iloveyou.
Sum up your life in one word:
I bet I can make you laugh. Remember Nicolas Cage in the remake of Wicker Man? NOT THE BEES! Did it work?
Can’t type, still laughing.
Thanks for taking part Jack. Now go clean the dishes…haha, I’m totally joking, it’s not like he’s my slave, *awkward nervous laugh* right Jack…Jack?