Said no girlfriend, ever

-New shoes? No thanks, I already have a pair.

-You want to go to the club? Okay, I’ll just get my Crocs.

-My butt looks adequately-sized in this, I don’t require a second opinion.

-Instead of that dinner date, let’s hit the strip club.

-Your new room-mate is a girl? Hope she’s hot.

-You should meet my friend Kate, she’s a Playmate.

-I was at the store and I picked you up some porn.

-We’re going out? You go ahead and take the bathroom, you’re grooming routine is more important than mine.

-Your friend Steve’s sexist jokes were so funny.

-I think you should drink more beer.

-You should definitely challenge my Father’s political opinions more.

-You’re running out of closet space. Here, take mine.

6 thoughts on “Said no girlfriend, ever

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